Have you ever been on a team that was right but you were penalised instead of being rewarded?

Story of my life. And yours?

We have all faced incidents like lane cutting during the rush hour traffic while you were following every driving rule written in the book of law. Or someone taking up the parking spot while you were halfway through the reverse. Or getting yelled at by a teacher or a manager for no fault of yours. It just happened to be a bad day. The list is endless. And some of the worst examples are those where people lose lives. Like the Air India flight to London that not only killed passengers on board, but a whole lot of others who were present in the doctor’s accommodation where the plane crashed.

Coming back to righteousness, do such episodes make you mad? They sure drive me up the wall. Why should I pay the price when I am right? Point is, if you are alive you may desire justice. But justice is nearly nowhere in sight. What do you do then? In traffic situations, people vent it out by speeding, overtaking, hurling insults, etc. In the case of office or school, there is no way you will challenge authority. It means you may have swallowed that morsel of insult and anger with no retaliation in sight.

I recently realised, my first reaction to any injustice has always been anger. In short, emotional. However, life is a combination of both good and bad experiences. And to expect life to sail smoothly is a recipe to disaster. So I experiemented. What if I were able to remove the emotions out of the experience? It needs a good amount of awareness and discipline to even start trying. Next, how about weighing the pros and cons of putting up a fight? As an example, we went to Honk Kong 10 years ago. THe entire holiday was pre-booked. But the minute we landed, we were informed that the travel agent who had sold us the package went bankrupt.

We didn’t take it to heart since we had made our payment in full. Unfortunately, all bookings made by that company stood cancelled. Our dream of staying in Disneyland came crashing down. We had two choices. Once, to book an alternative hotel and continue our holiday. Two, cancel the trip and fight a legal battle. Were we angry when we got the news? Absolutely. Did we think emotionally. Nope. We were under a lot of stress since we had two young kids and it was still winter. But here is what we chose to do. We went straight to Disneyland where we were assured our bookings stood cancelled. But the Disney staff helped us to reserve rooms in a hotel in the city and booked us a cab. None of our tickets got cancelled.

Our experience on the trip was altered. However, we made the most of the trip. Back home, I was furious we had to face such fate. But was it in my control? Nope. Was there anything I could do to feel slightly better? I wrote to stomp. My story was published. I wrote to CASE. And we received a complete refund of the amount we had pre-paid.

The end result, we felt satisfied, at least we did not lose our money. However, there are times when the benefit of putting up a fight are not worthy of the effort. In those cases what do you do?

Here are some things that can give more clarity –

1. You may feel cheated. But is the episode worth fighting for?
2. If yes, what is the tangible benefit? And does it justify the time, money and energy you will expend?
3. Sometimes, when the stakes are not that high, it is best to let the moment of anger pass. And take the situation as one unfortunate incident in the span of a lifetime of about 80 years.

When one leaves emotions aside and thinks logically, that is when the path of righteousness shines brighter. And as a next step, taking every bad experience as an opportunity to experiment and grow could make you more resilient and a better negotiator. You never know.

P.S. Righteousness is good. But at what cost? It is best to weigh the benefits of putting up a fight no matter how morally right you may be.