It is an exciting time of the year. Kids are soon completing another school year. Diwali and travel are around the corner. And there is a general joy of things slowing pace before ushering in the new year.

Have you noticed how we feel a certain way with specific smells, tastes, times of the year and even meeting certain people. The mind makes patterns. And once we have repeated our actions ample number of times, our subconscious functions on autopilot during those patterns.

And while festivals and celebrations are good patterns to be in, it is important to realise we cling to some negative patterns too. Like meeting people who make us feel less about ourselves. Or being in places that bring us back to trauma. It is all about realizing what patterns we follow.

And while the happy memories help us, it is the patterns that make us sad or depressed that need breaking and replacement. And like every other change, this one starts with awareness too.

I heard a podcast today that mentioned some techniques to break patterns.

1. Imagining the person we hold responsible like a joker.
2. Getting someone to interrupt our chain of thoughts when we think of them as a joker.
3. Replacing that break with an unrelated question.

I am not sure how well this works, but I am pretty sure taking life and people as they are or with a pinch of salt absolutely does. Choosing not to react but take it in slowly also dims the effect of hurt or pain. And ultimately, understanding that it is not what others say or the way they make us feel so much as we that ourselves that matters most.

P.S. So, the next time you lose your calm, think before you act. Watch what your trigger or pattern is, what or who has caused it, take notes what it does to you and what emotions it triggers. Then, figure out a plan to change it.