Ever heard someone yell, “I need my space…”

The world is full of ironical situations. There are people living in joint families that crave to live in a nuclear one. There are couples who travel so much because of work, they yearn to be together. And there are those who fight daily like they were arch nemesis, but refuse to separate.

At some point, we may be left alone in this journey of life. And while being alone is not the same as loneliness, we are all destined to feel lonely and isolated at some point in life. How then do we deal with this loneliness or isolation?

I remember the very first time I felt lonely. My best friend hit puberty before me and left me for more mature friends who like her, had started experiencing a new set of feelings like infatuation, attraction, etc. The naive me wasn’t ready for it. The end result, a broken heart after seven long years of best friendship. However, life is like the tide of the seas. I did find new friends and a new best friend too. When you are a kid, feeling depressed is impossible. Nature gives you a short attention span when it comes to emotional turmoil. Resilience and adaptation are more likely outcomes that keep you going.

However, adults seem less elastic when it comes to letting go, forgiving or moving on. As they grow older, adults become set in their patterns. They also begin to believe, they are incapable of change. As a result, loneliness becomes tough to deal with. Whether it is the empty nester syndrome or losing your spouse, best friend, parent or sibling, dealing with a big void one did not choose can become the toughest obstacle one can ever face.

I believe we come across this isolation for a reason. All our lives, we remain busy. With work, relationships, festivals, celebrations, etc. We hardly ever think what is the purpose of our existence in spheres besides materialistic success. Isolation is that forced free time that life throws at us to understand if a better version of ourselves is possible. When taken as an opportunity to go deeper within as opposed to finding love, success and happiness on the outside, isolation can become a haven of solitude. One that gives birth to peace, joy, contentment and growth in spirituality, learning and sharpening one’s intellect. If we choose to spend alone time learning a new skill, cultivating a hobby, working on self development or just being, we are more likely to grow happier and more useful to the society.

P.S. No matter what life throws at you, if you are ready to find a lesson, life becomes the greatest teacher. Like Rumi said, “Light enters where the wound is”. The obstacle becomes the way. So if life has thrown lemons at you, don’t make lemonade. Plant their seeds. Grow more lemons. Look for knowledge that elevates your conscience.